Monday 23 March 2015

Self-definition

** This might sound to you like some self-help blabber but this is what I've been thinking about for the last 90 days or so.


There is a common scene in movies where the guy is asked in an interview: who are you? So the guy stops and dramatically leaves the office trying to find an answer to that question. The movie ends and we leave the sofa feeling pitiful for the guy who cannot define himself. But can you? Who are you?

I once received a piece of advice from someone. It said that I should not overthink and I should just be productive. But that didn't work.

Everything was ok until all of a sudden - when I gave myself some time to think - something was not ok. I couldn't really point it out. I felt a little lost. I was living by other people's definitions. Their definition of happy. Their definition of successful. Their definition of my own self! Just like wearing a costume tailored for you by other people. Yet, it never fits you.

So I had to draw a comparison between who I am now and who I was the last time I truly felt that I was being myself. And wow! Everything was so different! My worries, my ambitions, my role models, my concepts and my daily life activities. I don't know how and when all of this happened. And of course, you can't give up 2/3 of the things that define you then complain about feeling down and uninspired.. Well DUH! Because you are simply not "you" anymore. Consequently, you will never be fully productive and you'll never do anything wholeheartedly.

So what's your self-definition?

Cambridge Advanced defines "self" as "a set of someone's characteristics, such as personality and ability, which are not physical and make that person different from other people. "
Personality .. Ability .... Different!

By the way, you never ask yourself "Who am I?" when you're being yourself. Your mind doesn't need a verbal statement if you're whole being is practicing it. So the moment you ask yourself that or the moment you start missing an old version of your "self" … STOP! You need to get back to your self-made self-definition.

The bright side is … I found my self-definition when I lost it.
You are absolutely right, Thoreau!

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